lilyth

Transitioning out of hibernation…

The joke here is that as I begin to move from doing the inner alchemy and healing work of spirit to the outer alchemy which includes the presentation and incorporation of that healing that I am coming out of hibernation. I will be more active and engaging but it goes beyond this, the trick is to hold onto the lessons and healing that I have done in the last phase of My Alchemy(TM) while continuing to heal and grow in a way that is visible this time…

During this first week of transition, I have swapped my crystals out after they charged up while on my altar over the Ostara weekend and done my first throw with them. I have shuffled my “monthly” card and will be using this as my guide during the shift. My card for this is the Sage. The Sage appears as a reminder that we have gained knowledge and wisdom during our turn inward over the last seasons (Mabon to Ostara) and now we engage in those lessons and share them with others. This card is the gateway towards an outward expression of this path I am walking on. It is with the guidance of the Sage, I will learn to present all I have learned and guide others in this path soon enough.

The weekly card for me is the Six of Water. As I move from inner alchemy to outer alchemy, remember that above all I must be myself and find an anchor in that. The past has helped shape me, the lessons guided me through healing and now I can release the hold the past held on my spirit and move forward. Compassion, forgiveness, and healing are keywords for this card and I will pull all those elements forward with me. I will seek for every interaction to be filled with compassion and send hope that it continues from me to others.

When growth meets an obstacle

This morning when I pulled my cards for a daily reading I was both surprised and not by the message received. As I mentioned in my last post, my focus has been shifting and the healing continues in my life and my path grows. I previously shared my weekly and monthly cards from Dreams of Gaia. During the week I also pull cards daily in my Chrysalis Tarot (shuffled on the first of every month for a month-long focus) and then my Beyond Lemuria Oracle which gets shuffled every two weeks with the New and Full moons. This method while non-traditional works very well for me and it really helps.

Four of Stones, Chrysalis Tarot. Resing in the lid of a handmade Tarot Box

Today, I pulled the Four of Stones from Chrysalis Tarot. This card is a MESSAGE. *laugh* This card is coming to me today to tell me that there is something blocking my path forward. This beautiful bejeweled chest is distracting and holds within it material possessions treasured and the whispers of those that are sought. If I am to move forward in my path and achieve my dreams, I must move the chest aside. My focus has been split between squirreling away treasures and growth. Treasures are bits and pieces of my path and life that aid but sometimes prove to be distractions. This card tells me to be more aware of the “ooh shiny” distraction of acquiring wealth or other material things that could hamper the growth process with all the sparkling that they do.

This is a good reminder that as I move from working within to out I will need to adjust my mindset and “move the chest” obstructing my path forward. The time to shift these gears is upon me and I shall move forward with a little effort to remove blocks….

Expansion of Self

Tarot and oracle cards are an excellent method of growth and healing within our spiritual paths and lives. Many years ago, I began incorporating the use of cards to get a look at the energy for the day, week, or month…depending on the timing of the draw. It started out sporadically and has grown to a practice that involves multiple decks and the creation of a new system of alchemizing the messages that the cards bring.

Self, Dreams of Gaia Tarot

My monthly energy is coming up on completion as March hits the halfway point and Ostara approaches, the energy I am working with is that of the Self. Thematically, this month is about working with my relationship with myself and acceptance. It’s a path of healing and expansion. I have been fully immersed in taking care of myself this month, especially since for the last week I’ve had a cold. *laugh* Before I became sick, I have been doing a lot of introspection and healing for the last several months through my path and the creation of my new method which utilizes both tarot, crystals, a little astrology, and some journaling along the way. In the time since I began using this, I have healed and grown in ways that were not even a consideration. It has been incredible and later this year I will be sharing this process and path through Sacred Mists as a workshop and membership option. It’s very exciting, the method works.

Three of Air, Dreams of Gaia Tarot

This week, the three of air steps in to tell me that it’s time to pay attention to my studies as it is essential to be combined with the ongoing healing and overall growth that I am pursuing as a part of my path to reaching a higher vibration for myself. After all, we are a combination of our knowledge, our actions/reactions, our energetic light, and the connections we make. It is when we throw all this in the “mixer” we call life that we can share our energy, our light, and we can find wisdom in the path we walk. We can share these mysteries and paths with others and elevate ourselves to more compassionate beings on this beautiful planet, Earth.

 

A visit with water…

Winter Beach Surf

A windy day at Rialto Beach as the waves crash

For as long as I can remember, water has been my solace, my place where I find balance and am able to let go of pretty much everything that is plaguing my mind or spirit. Water is the flow of life, it encompasses all levels from being soothing to deadly and without it well we would not exist.

It’s been a while since I took time to write and I can tell because I feel scattered and all over the place. It’s cold and previously has been snowy so a visit to the water is not in the cards right now. I make due by spending time in a warm bubble bath with candles when I can and on the busy days, I settle into washing dishes by hand just so that I have the comfort of water.

I’ve not been what you would call “well” for a while. Between struggles with my sinus’, back, and knee pain I also struggle with depression and anxiety. Right now it’s finally starting to recede, I think. It faked me out a little last week with one or two pretty good days then bit me again saying no, I am not done with you yet. I’ve started a new supplement to help with it and I am less than a week into it so we will see how it goes in another few days. I’m not willing to say this episode is over yet. It’s been the longest episode of depression I’ve had in a long time but not as severe as some in the past. Yes, there was a lot of ideation and thoughts of cutting but I did not develop a plan nor did I self-harm so I will take it as a slight win. The ideation is still there but it’s not as severe as in previous episodes.

Working through and resolving a history of trauma is not easy and my path helps me along in that greatly. How you may ask? Every day I sit down in the morning at my desk with my daily draw from my Beyond Lemuria Oracle deck. I sit with the card and consider the message while working to apply it to my life. I’ve added in working with Kuan Yin Oracle and learning to work with Kuan Yin to increase the positive alignment within to be more compassionate, kind, forgiving, and willing to extend mercy to those who have harmed. In these actions, I have found a base to allow myself to FEEL and RELEASE some of the negativity that surrounds me. I am able to slowly begin letting go of the bindings of my heart and spirit. Soon I will soar.

Regaining bits of me.

Once upon a time I used to write, a lot. I wrote short stories, I wrote poetry. Somewhere along the line, like so many other things that I used to do and used to enjoy, I stopped. It became a place where judgment ruled and being judged was not something I wanted to subject myself to. The habit of comparing myself to others caused me to harshly judge the things that I enjoyed to the enjoyment of others and in that, I made myself…less. I continued to shrink myself down until there was no enjoyment of these hobbies or random thoughts that would flit through my head in some manner of rhythm. Eventually, all the enjoyment was stripped and I stopped doing everything.

Now I’m sitting and looking at the things I used to enjoy from painting, to writing, to beading, and beyond trying to figure out how to recapture the wonder and joy that I felt during the creation process. For some things, it is also trying to figure out what to do with the created items.

Clawing back to find my creativity and joy in life. I decided to start with photography. I love taking pictures and sharing the beauty of the natural world. A new camera is now mine and photos have started. Mostly things in my own little forest space and dogs or cats so far but I am greatly enjoying the play aspect.

Here are a few photos I’ve recently taken…

A small amount of lichen grows from a fallen tree.

Pine sprig hanging off a branch.

Close up of a tree’s bark

The fallen tree lovingly referred to as “log” when playing with the dogs in the forest.

Wolf lichen grows near and on a decomposing branch fallen to the forest floor.

A light green and pink fluorite rests on a tree log.

The sun shines on a couple of trees in the forest.

The sun plays with the forest.

Threw the box away…

King of Earth Dreams of Gaia Tarot Card and Crystals

The King of Earth tarot card from the Dreams of Gaia Tarot deck with a raw piece of rainbow obsidian, Tibetan quartz, amethyst, and a smoky amethyst scepter.

Sometimes you have to step outside the box to really see yourself grow and your vibration to be elevated. I decided to throw the box away…for the last five months, I have been creating a new process that utilizes crystals, astrology, tarot, and witchcraft to bring my journey and path to greater harmony. This is something that I have really enjoyed creating and while I am still working out how to get it out there, I continue to use it and grow myself…

The process I’ve created works. In the time I’ve been developing and testing it with a friend I have seen incredible personal growth and have slowly started to lift myself out of the constant hamster wheel of anxiety. Oh, it still happens but I am able to sit and work with it most of the time and come out on the other side of it a little more peaceful.

My weekly card this week is the King of Earth…I’m digging his message to me…

This is a success story. Right now it is not the time to make changes but to sit and honor your process. Do the research, look at the long-range with what you will need to become successful in your pursuits. Do not forget to stop and enjoy the journey along the way and perhaps bring that journey into the process for greater understanding. It is through understanding and patience that we are able to make the long race successful.

Living rurally during a pandemic

It’s been over a year now that we’ve lived in rural Port Angeles. I don’t have the lay of the land as well as I had hoped, I do not have any new connections or friends and I still have not seen my brother that lives in Seattle. The pandemic put a damper on all our best-laid plans and you’d think we’d have time to do things like finish going through boxes and all that but it’s not the case. Something that I think others may have forgotten is that when you are already a remote employee, nothing changes for you except the inability to get out and forge those connections that give us friendship and an outlet.

Where does this leave those of us who were already working from home? As my dad would say, up shit’s creek without a paddle. Depression sets in and while it is on one hand situational and will alleviate to those of us that have been diagnosed with depression it’s much more insidious than you may think. You see we are already fighting a battle for our minds and spirits then add in the isolation, lockdowns, the climate of the world in general and you have a recipe for potential disaster.

It is not surprising to me to see so many people hurting right now with the lack of social connection. Even introverts require some social interactions to refuel themselves. We have seen a rise in online gatherings and that is wonderful and has definitely helped. What type of changes have you made to your routine and life to help with social events during these periods of unrest and public health crisis?

Sitting with Fear

Do you open the door you fear? YES

I started to write this more than a week ago now but the time was simply not right. I needed to actually SIT in fear and do something about that fear before I could write this. What does it mean to sit in fear? Well to me this is where it’s uncomfortable to be. I am outside my comfort zone, I am in territory that for some reason I do not feel like I belong and so I fear it. I fear taking a step. I fear not taking a step. I fear looking in the mirror. I fear not looking in the mirror. It’s all very disquieting to the spirit.

What do you do when you sit in fear? You feel it. You let it surround you. You breathe through it and then after you have felt it you expel it. You breathe it out of existence at that moment and you take one step. Then another.  You will stop along the path you are walking and have to sit in fear again. Face that and conquer it. When you look at it, dead-on, you take some of the power it holds over you back. As you stare at it and raise your chin higher, you continue to take your power back. The greater your power, the less hold the fear will have over you. Always feel that fear, if you do you know you are on the right track and magick is happening. Every step we take outside our comfort-zone is magickal, empowering, and divine.